I’ve often wondered why suddenly, quite out of the blue, I think about someone I haven’t seen in a long time. Lately, I’ve been thinking about Paula Pfeiffer, a girl I knew in my school days. Over the past week, I’ve seen her face, heard her voice, and remember a drawing she made of a guitar.
Paula and I were friends, but never terribly close. She was in and out of my life. Her parents were among the first I ever knew to have been divorced, and I think she moved between their two houses, so she wasn’t always at the same school as me.
I remember seeing her in high school after a long absence. She looked a little spaced out and her hair seemed funny to me. I knew something was awry, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Weeks, or maybe months later, my memory doesn’t serve me, she died. It turns out she had leukemia. She was probably on drugs and wearing a wig the last time I saw her.
I remember driving to her mother’s house for a wake. I couldn’t get up the courage to go inside. I felt embarassed that I didn’t really know her anymore, but wished there was some way I could communicate that I had always liked her. She was good and sweet and kind.
In another strange twist, my husband and I watched 2010 on Sunday, February 10th. We’d thought about watching something else, but then had a “feeling” about 2010. It was as good as we remembered, even recognizing Helen Mirren in a way we hadn’t before – that was her? Goodness, she’s been around for a while. The strangest part, however, as I learned today, is that the star of the movie, Roy Scheider, died that very day, possibly as we were watching.
Are these two people communicating with me? Or did their cosmic dust, caught in the ebb and flow of the universe, just cross paths with me, a happy coincidence? I really don’t know, but if there is something greater happening here, message received. I remember you…you are not lost.
It is interesting to begin a blog with death and memory, but I guess that is what this is all about – telling the universe that I am here. I feel, think, believe, exist, just like Paula and Roy did. We are all together, embarking, disembarking in blogs and in life. Welcome to another part of the journey.