March 2011

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No Fear

As a bee seeks nectar from all kinds of flowers,

Seek teachings everywhere.

Like a deer that finds a quiet place to graze,

Seek seclusion to digest all that you have gathered.

Like a mad one beyond all limits,

Go where you please and live like a lion, completely free of all fear.

from the Dzogchen Tantra

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I am doing my best to embrace an ebb period, gaining strength as I swim circles in the vortex of life.  Writing, for me, right now, is pretty difficult.  Keeping a single train of thought is also difficult, and, quite frankly, tiring.  I feel as though my brain is chasing some bit of ephemera.  Every time I feel I have it, it slips from my grasp.  There are, however, moments of illumination, which I hold gratefully in a tight metaphorical embrace.  Like that last post, it came pouring out while I was making the soufflé pictured above (which was delicious), two minutes on a blue legal pad, boom.  I’ve got it!  This post, well, I’ve been at the keyboard for about an hour, scratching my head, and it still feels a bit off.  Definitely ebbing.  Hoping the best for you.

p.s. Thanks Katie, for asking.  I appreciate it!

Same

Ebbing and flowing.

All places I’ve been before and will be again.

Beautiful and bright as summer sun.

Dark and ugly as pain.

In between, wondering.

I listen for clues.

Everywhere.

Take me where I want to be.

Pure love resides there.

Tiny before exploding into greatness.

No air.

Then I remember.

I’m already there.

Here.

Ebbing and flowing.

Colleen Sohn

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This is true happiness: to have no ambition and to work like a horse as if you had every ambition. To live far from men, not to need them, and yet to love them. To have the stars above, the land to your left, and the sea to your right, and to realize all of a sudden that in your heart, life has accomplished its final miracle: it has become a fairy tale.

Nikos Kazantzakis


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Very cold and uninspired today, so I am resorting to my favorite page in Vanity Fair, the very last, or first, in my case.  Have I ever told you that I read magazines back to front?  It’s probably because I am a left-handed deviant.

Perfect Happiness: Being warm, but not hot, while doing exactly what I please.  The hubster is nearby doing the same.

Greatest Fear: Unrecognized talent.

Most Admired: Anyone unafraid to live the truth.

My Most deplored trait: Spiteful.

Most deplored trait in others: Insecurity.  It colors everything.

The Most Overrated Virtue: Honor.

What do I dislike most about my appearance? My toes.

What living person do I most despise? Myself, though I’m getting better.

Words or phrases I most overuse: You know?

Greatest Regret: Not loving myself sooner.

Greatest Love of My Life: Gregory Spencer Cooper

Happiest Time: Right Now.

Talent would I most like to have: To work harder. To be more focused.

Current State of Mind: Pleasant anticipation.

One thing I’d like to change about myself: Lengthen my unpredictable fuse.

One thing I’d like to change about my family: Less insecurity would be nice.

Greatest Achievement: Me

Lowest Depth of Misery? Not believing in one’s worth.

Favorite Occupation: Enjoying life as it is, not as it “should” be.

My Most Marked Characteristic: Desire to improve.

What do I most value in my friends? Ease in their own skin.

Real Life Heroes: RFK, Gandhi, Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King, Jr.

Most Dislike: The various incarnations of insecurity.  It’s a definite theme for me.

What animal would I come back as? A cormorant – I could swim, fly, and not mind the cold.

How would I like to die? Peacefully.

What is your motto? Be yourself.

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