When winds are raging o’er the upper ocean
And billows wild contend with angry roar,
’Tis said, far down beneath the wild commotion
That peaceful stillness reigneth evermore.
Far, far beneath, the noise of tempests dieth
And silver waves chime ever peacefully,
And no rude storm, how fierce so e’er it flyeth
Disturbs the Sabbath of that deeper sea.
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Hi everyone –
A few happy items to start: it is the summer solstice! The peonies are still blooming! It is actually warm outside! Happy, happy, happy Tuesday.
So this morning I was outside reading, as per my routine, and Pema (gosh, I know, I’m writing {and talking} about her a lot, but that’s just where I am right now, so feel free to come back later) was talking about this experience she had where a group of people vacillated between treating her as no big deal and a very big deal. It became painful for her because just as she was settled into a groove of feeling one way or the other, it would change. Finally, she spoke her frustrations aloud and was told, “You have to learn to be big and small at the same time.” I kind of took it in and thought, “Oh that’s very wise,” but didn’t really digest it. The birds were chirping and Milo was on my lap, and my attention wandered to the peonies, and what else I had yet to do, and the gorgeous quality of light.
Then I was raking up some debris out front and this Mortimer (Pema’s name for an “enemy”) that’s acted pretty hateful toward me for some time came along and said, “Good morning Colleen!” It was in a nice voice, too, not at all like the Jerry and Newman exchange, that I’m barely tolerating you mister, so keep your distance kind of tone. I said hello back, a bit shocked and confused, and continued my raking. Then Mortimer started talking again, complimenting my yard and garden and expressing distaste at the fact that it is supposed to be eighty degrees today. We chatted, very friendly, before parting with a good day salutation and me feeling a little weak in the knees at the conversation. What just happened? I thought Mortimer hated me!
Suddenly my mind went back to my reading. I knew exactly what Pema was talking about. Those times when Mortimer acts like a best pal. Those times when a good friend is a total bitch. Those times when someone who is normally chatty and boisterous crosses the street to avoid conversation. Those crap-shoot moody people – nice one time, mean the next.
Holy smokes! This is what it means to be big and small at the same time, to be open, to breathe in whatever is offered, and breathe it out just the same. I can do this! Well, at least today, at this moment, because that’s all I’ve got.
What a perfect summer day sounds like…
“Transform” – T.J. Rehmi
“Morning Has Broken” – Cat Stevens
“Easy” – The Commodores
“Rough Rock & Pinon” – Zachary J. Mechlem
“Lost in My Mind” – The Head and The Heart
“1952 Vincent Black Lightning” – Richard Thompson (the awesome inspiration)
“American Girl” – Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
“Tempted” – Squeeze
“In a Big Country” – Big Country
“I Feel for You” – Chaka Khan
“Boogie on Reggae Woman” – Stevie Wonder
“Places to Go” – 50 Cent
“Make Some Noise” – Beastie Boys
“Tunic” – Sonic Youth
“Ceremony” – New Order (thinking of you, Bridget and Jessica!)
“Praise You” – Fat Boy Slim
“Waltz for Koop” – Koop
“Sail to the Moon” – Radiohead
It is not revolutions and upheavals that clear the way to new and better days, but someone’s soul, inspired and ablaze.
Boris Pasternak
Tags: Quoting
Afternoon, friends. How are you this fine Wednesday? I am well, and, I think, officially middle aged. Is forty middle aged? Or does the saying, “Fifty is the new forty” mean I’ve got ten more years? Oh bother. I’m forty, four-zero, shaken-not-stirred, straight-no-chaser (a la Thelonious Monk), with new wrinkles to prove it! Seriously, I think the skin on my face lost a millimeter or two of elasticity in the last two weeks. And here I thought I was Ms. Fancy Pants!
As I am not a super celebratory kind of gal, we had a yard sale on the big day, which was, now that I think about it, a bit of a party. We chatted it up and had laughs with many neighbors, strangers, and friends. The hubster and I shared high-fives and danced a couple of jiggety-jigs after getting rid of quite an accumulation of stuff we no longer needed, also freeing a rather large portion of our basement from a cumbersome burden.
This included nearly our entire CD collection (we’ve gone digital!), which, at times, made me a little misty-melancholy, as someone put a rather fine selection into their purchase pile and my mind traveled to places we’d been together: driving in my 1981 Toyota Celica listening to Joy Division, chilling on the sofa to Miles Davis, singing at the top of my voice to the Doors and Rolling Stones. Ahh, nostalgia.
To to top it off, the peonies are blooming (hello Coral Charm!) and we partook of some Late Night Snack, the very yummy Jimmy Fallon flavor from Ben and Jerry’s. Salty and sweet, creamy and crunchy, it is a perfect flavor and texture combination. I expect nothing less from Mr. Fallon.
So, forty feels fine: older, wiser, sillier, more supple, yet obstinate, too. How are you?
